'Dating Yourself 101': You Are Your Greatest Company
by Nicole Myden
Whether you're partnered up or not, becoming comfortable with the concept of "dating yourself" is a crucial step in becoming a more mindful and self-aware individual. Dating yourself and loving your own company allows you to constantly stay in the highest vibration to receive and attract in all areas of life while also placing yourself directly in the environments and activities that fuel your soul. When you do things you love, you are plain and simply operating from your most authentic self. So...if you're not partnered up in this moment in time, what a great way to attract more like-minded people into your world who share similar interests and values. If you are partnered up, what a great way to still enjoy activities you love and show your significant other the importance of continuously dating each other through new and fun experiences in the relationship.
As you get to experience more and more years on this beautiful planet, gaining an understanding of where, how and who you are spending your time and energy with and on should be a top priority to give yourself clarity around. So many people spend their lives living out of schedule obligations because they feel they 'have to' -- to that we say, eliminate the word 'obligation' from your vocabulary. You are not obligated to do anything you don't want to. We repeat, you are not obligated to do anything you don't want to. The goal is to become more and more comfortable learning to say NO to the activities and people that drain your energy so your schedule is free for only things that bring you joy, including dating yourself.
Each of you are more than deserving of your best designed life, therefore you should be constantly creating the love, joy, look and feel of that life, wherever and whenever possible. If you are especially new to your city, dating yourself is a great way to be a tourist in your own town and explore all the happenings right in your own backyard. People often times get fixated on filling stamps in their passport and traveling to far off destinations. While those global trips are so important to create time for as well, there's something to be said about taking time to truly tour your own town and get to know it inside and out...just like yourself.
Similar to maintaining consistency with practices of working out, eating healthy, meditation and all ways you continue to challenge yourself to expand and grow, "dating yourself" is also a practice that requires nurturing in all the same ways. If the concept and practice of committing to "dating yourself" seems somewhat daunting, don't worry one bit. We're here to help you get started and simplify it for you. Your job is to remain open minded to the idea, stay fearless and commit to having fun in applying the steps below:
How to Design Your "Me Date"
Step 1: Make a very clear list of all the fun things you want to experience in your city. This could be anything from a movie you want to see, to an upcoming concert, art exhibit, street fair or new restaurant you want to try. Following your favorite local city social influencers online, reading your local city magazines and newspapers are a few great local resources to dive into as you begin to build out your vibrant list of dates to go on.
Step 2: Now that you have your list of experiences and activities to enjoy, it is time to schedule 'me date' time into your calendar. Build the dates into your calendar around work, family and friend time, workout classes, vacations and all the other things that you bring you joy. To keep things simple and ease into this practice, start by scheduling 1 "me date" per week, giving you 4 total over the course of a month. That's a very easy, attainable and fun goal for anyone to get comfortable with.
Step 3: If your 'me date' is to try a new restaurant or go to a concert or show -- anything that requires a little planning ahead, make sure to generate a reservation or purchase tickets ahead of time, reserve your uber if needed so you can arrive and depart safely. Planning all details with ease will make any date more enjoyable and details are always important and thoughtful to enhance any experience. Show yourself and the Universe how much you value the details, they truly are everything. The details also set a tone of standards and respect - - like anything in life, you must treat yourself how you wish others to treat you. If you love on yourself and honor yourself enough to make arrangements ahead of time, you will attract a partner who values that just the same.
Step 4: Make sure to plan your outfit ahead of time. We can't emphasize this enough. Your energy and detail in the wardrobe for the date will dictate the energy and vibe you want to put out into the experience and world. If your date is to try a new restaurant and go to a jazz club, leave the sweats and workout gear at home in the closet. Instead, whip out that sexy new dress you have been saving for a special outing, do your hair and makeup and put yourself in the feeling, literally from head to toe, that you want to be experiencing. You will see how much more enjoyable your night is when you have the right outfit to match your vibe. When people see a confident, authentically happy and well dressed individual enjoying themselves freely, especially by themselves, that energy is not only contagious...it's magical.
Step 5: The 'me date' day or night has arrived --- your mission should you chose to accept it....GO HAVE FUN, that's it. Keep things light, have fun and just enjoy yourself. Take pictures and share your experience via social media if you wish, but we definitely encourage you to not spend your entire "me date" on your phone simply because you are out alone. It's incredibly important to be present, be in the moment, look around and observe people, your environment and enjoy without feeling the need to be fixated on your newsfeed. If you're looking down at your phone, how will you will be able to lock eyes with someone else and exchange energy and strike up a conversation with someone you are meant to talk to and meet.
Remember you and only you are truly your own limitation for not having any experience in life you desire. Don't let anyone or anything hold you back from enjoying all the places and moments you want to create and experience. Confidence, value and self-awareness are some of the most attractive qualities a person can illuminate. Be your own light!!! If you are sitting in a restaurant in a sexy dress, having fun, smiling because your excitement for life exudes through everything you do, you will inspire at least one other person in that restaurant to maybe go out and do the same. In order to be the energy you wish to see in the world, you must lead by feeling it and creating it for yourself first....now go plan your ME DATE!
Inspired to take some time for yourself? Check out our Yoga Workshop on 9/7 - the perfect place to spend some time on YOU.